round, round, round she goes; where she stops nobody knows

Although the evidence can't be seen here, I do actually blog, a lot. I just don't have a computer in front of me at the time. I have composed hundreds of entries, mentally, and proceeded to forget them by the time a computer was accessible. Oh well. There's enough yapping voices screaming for attention in the world without mine getting lost in the mix.


But here I go anyway! yap yap yap...


I am changing. It's kinda weird but really good. My perspectives on health and life, church; my expectations, my hopes, my desires, beliefs - they are all changing. And the vast vast majority of people I know would laugh at and dispense with me entirely if they were to really follow these thought trains with me. Most Christians I know would be offended, scared, threatened, suspicious. Most non-Christians would be as well.

All I can say is, it is a time of change, of flux, of upheaval. Something is going to give. Something might break. Things will be lost, things will be gained. It will be good. God is in it.

I mentioned last year about feeling stagnant, personally relating somehow to waters that weren't integrated into the flow of a stream. You've seen this, right? You know what I'm talking about?


Picture a stream. It is crystal clear. The sun in shining through it, and through the ripply texture of its flow and motion you can easily discern every rock in the bed, even its mottled or solid color. It makes you smile. There is something so fresh and life giving about it. It seems right and natural. Then you look on down the stream a ways, and you see this pocket off to the side. It is kinda covered in what looks like a layer of scum. It is not flowing with the rest of the stream. For whatever reasons of physics and its physical boundaries jutting it out from the center of motion, this little pool is left swirling around and around on itself. It looks murky and gross. You think, ugh, what happened there? blech. You don't even want to touch it. You can't hardly keep from touching the fresh looking water. While the stream only a couple feet away looks like the definition of purity and refreshing cleanliness, this looks like it might hold disease and bugs. If it were possible, the water looks sick.

There is much more to this principle and pattern in our lives. Chinese medicine, and a number of other health disciplines and schools of understanding attribute a number of health issues to an interrupted or poorly flowing stream of energy in the body. It is called the qi in the Chinese perspective. Is it stagnant, slow, or interrupted? Problems will follow - emotional, physical, and spiritual.

I am not ready to present all my applications for this. I need clearer articulations prepared before they are accessible. But I feel there are many.

There is life in the motion, there is death in the stagnation. It doesn't just look that way for fun. We are attracted to one and repulsed by the other for a reason. We are not that different from the stream.

- By motion I certainly do not mean that we need a constant state of variety and change in our lives to be happy and healthy. Good grief no.-

When I find out how to say what I do mean, I'll get back to you.